I first met Pytor when I was in my first year at university in Kingston. We crossed paths at an event at City Hall. I saw him across the room talking with a group of people while a small kid sat comfortably on his shoulders. Pretty quickly I realized he was facilitating the presence of a group of youth, and I left City Hall with an invitation to spend time with them at their next gathering.
I visited Pytor’s home a few times that winter, and one particular evening stands out in my memory. I was sitting in his kitchen and telling him about a recent person I had come to know. “They’re pretty much just a better version of me,” I said. “That’s the easiest way to put it.”
I think you’d have to know Pytor to know the balance of wry gentleness with which he said, “It’s not.”
“There’s a story that in every person there are two wolves,” he continued. “One wolf is dark, he is anger, violence, greed, regret, and inferiority, and destruction. The other wolf is light, he is love, kindness, gentleness, compassion, self-worth and truth. These wolves are always circling each other, always fighting each other. They fight every day without stopping until one wolf wins.”
I held onto my mug of tea. “How do you know which wolf wins?”
He looked at me steadily. “It’s the one you feed.”
That was the first teaching I remember learning from Pytor, but it was the first of many. From him I’ve learned about speaking authentically, laughing easily, uplifting youth and pushing hard to do what’s right. I’ve learned ceremony practices and Indigenous belief systems. I’ve seen him break up a fight between two teenage boys and I’ve seen him kneel to hold the hand of an Indigenous grandmother.
I’m proud to call him a friend and I’m privileged to have him as a mentor.
Pytor’s company 3 Things Consulting works with Indigenous communities across Canada to build capacities for resilience, healing and youth leadership. Asad and I share their commitment to reconciliation, and one of the ways we will be doing that is by amplifying Indigenous voices and histories throughout this project. We intend to be allies to the Indigenous communities whose traditional lands we will be travelling on.
Pytor, along with Bernard Nelson and Shannon Payne, is providing guidance, connections and prayer in order for us to cross the country in a good way. Our stories that speak to Indigenous issues and experiences will be thanks to their support.
We spent today participating in a reconciliation circle led by 3 Things, listening to stories and letting tears spill out of our eyes. The closing ceremony included an Oji-Cree prayer for Asad and I, as well as a gift of medicine bags with the sacred medicines tobacco, cedar, sage, sweetgrass and juniper to carry with us on our journey.
As we left our minds were open and our hearts were full, and I wondered if I could still feel their arms around me even as we drove on down the road.
Chi-miigwetch.